Recovering

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  • #7232
    Disturbed
    Participant

    Soooo…..I just wanted to share. I am beginning the recovery process. I went out this past Saturday to an event for the first time since leaving the church. Prior to the weekend I was very excited, when I accepted the invitation. On Saturday I began to procrastinate. I delayed getting showered and dressed. All previous Saturdays I have stayed home and didn’t do ANY work. I began to force myself to prepare myself for the event. After I was dressed I almost had a panic attack because I felt I was desecrating the sabbath day. I then realized if I didn’t go I would be letting “them” win. God is love, fear is of satan. I was fashionably late to the event but it was ok because others arrived well after me. I must say I had an awesome time and was relieved that I forced myself to go. I am taking back my life! I allowed them so many years of my life, thinking at every moment the world was ending soon. I have started a “bucket list”. One entry is to ride in a hot air balloon. My family member said, “are you sure…we don’t have the seal”. I said who cares! I’m not living my life fearing death. I can’t make up for the years I lost but I will enjoy the present time & try to live to the fullest!

    Sorry for rambling. Just wanted to share my thoughts & feelings.

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