Ever since I left the Church of God I've had to battle with my own personal demons that were dormant I guess. I used to struggle with alcohol and partying for the longest time. I had a period of time where I stopped and life was really great. I got baptized into the COG in 2006. From there I was a pretty devout member. Anyways I feel away and I started to sink deeper into alcholism and partying all weekend long. I simply lost my love for God. My tour in the COG destroyed my faith in the bible and I have no faith at in a higher power. Which hurts because I need one…I know that. Even before the COG when I was doing bible studies I had a feeling of obligation to God and that led me to stay away from certain things. Now fast forward to 2013 and I'm a mess. I'm pretty much an alcoholic and I see my life is fading away. I have a wonderful family and even though they still attend COG services I don't care. I guess I'm trying to figure out how I can get my faith in God back. Its hard for me to stomach anything really biblical. Sorry for the rant…but this has been on my mind for quite some time.
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