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I'm so lost. I had entire paragraphs typed out here with all of my struggles and emotions but all it comes down to is that I'm lost. I was raised on God before the cult. I grew up with the teachings that God was the reason I was awake that day, the reason I beat cancer, the reason for many great things. Then the cult made me think that Satan was the reason I was awake that day, in the physical world called Earth. Satan was the reason I was given cancer, in my temporary physical body. Satan was the reason for the greatness of 'all phsyical things' …and now I'm out, and I'm lost. If you're reading this, does any of it make sense?
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